Are you defective?

Almost everyone is screwed up, broken, clingy, scared, and yet designed for joy. Even (or especially) people who seem to have it more or less together are more like the rest of us than you would believe. I try not to compare my insides to their outsides, because this makes me much worse than I already am, and if I get to know them, they turn out to have plenty of irritability and shadow of their own. Besides, those few people who aren’t a mess are probably good for about twenty minutes of dinner conversation.

Anne Lamott

One thing I’ve learned through coaching so many people is that every single one of us feels like we have a deficiency in some way shape or form.

I’m too x. I always do y. I can never do z.

It reminds me of social media. With today’s technology, we can advertise whatever kind of life we want people to see. The same is true for any sort of image we have.

We can look at someone’s LinkedIn and feel envy. But what we don’t see is them fighting with their spouse, having panic attacks, or consolidating their debt.

Everyone has their shit. Even the ones with their “shit together.”

The thing is, we’re not defective. We each have wildly different strengths, weaknesses, and tendencies. We’re all capable of learning and growing.

If we were a car, we have the ability to take it into the shop, repair it, and spruce it up. Not everybody takes advantage of that truth, but it is true nonetheless.