Confidence is not a necessity. It’s a reward.
I’ve had nearly a thousand coaching conversations with people. I’ve heard it every week for over a year.
“I just need more confidence.”
In other words: “I must first have this internal emotional change. Then and only then will I be physically able to do what I want to do.”
It’s totally understandable. But it’s nonsense.
If confidence is the belief in oneself, how can we have such faith when we’re unskilled and inexperienced in a thing? Unless we’re full of ourselves, we’ll naturally be nervous and unclear. That’s okay.
Being scared has nothing to do with us being able to do something. We do scary stuff all the time. If we don’t, it’s not because of inability; it’s because we choose not to.
Running a business. Talking to people we’re attracted to. Improving a skill.
We often think: “I need to learn X so I can do Y.”
When in reality, it’s: “I need to do Y and then I’ll learn X.”
Do first. Then feel confident as a reward for doing.
Don’t wait for it to fall into your lap.